Dear BIL and GF,
You lose.
Be sure you know your adversary before you're idiot enough to try to take a bite out of them. 30 years of battle scars and crap to get off my one's chest gives me one a big lead.
Signed,
Game on.
Dear Shitbag of a Human Being,
Outing someone out of maliciousness and the need to spread 'juicy gossip' backfired. ( This person might never face you but give me a chance and I'd tear a strip off you down one side & up the other) There was always a question about your intelligence, now you opened up your mouth and removed all doubts. Long after you are gone, you will be talked about with disgust. You deserve it.
Signed,
Nauseated by you.
Dear WestJet,
Thank you for the experience of your seasoned pilot. Despite the insane winds, he landed with minimal bumps and jostling. And you know it's windy when he had to circle the skies waiting for it to die down. Kudos!
Signed,
A grateful flier.
Dear New First Time Flyer Friend,
I was happy to be able to help you through your first flight. You did very well and I am rooting for you. I hope your proposal of marriage to your children's father was met with a resounding yes and a round of applause by onlookers. You have risen above the garbage life gave you..
Signed,
Glad to be in the right place at the right time.
Dear Fil,
Work your magic. Make it happen. You owe her.
Signed,
Did my part, now do yours.
Dear Lynn and Melanie,
Thanks for the laughs and the memories of long long ago. It was an unforgettable evening. However, no thanks for the copious amounts of alcohol you supplied to this lightweight, although I will cop to my rubber arm. Lynn, thanks for being an absolute pal and drinking half that last beer. I do believe it would of been the straw that broke this drunk ass. Melanie, to use your fav expression, I loves ya, Baby!
Waiting to hear from both of you on one of your drunk dialing nights, Rick was laughing about his call. Not sure what Sherry thought of hers.. ;-)
Signed,
Never drinking again ;-)
Dear Lynn and Melanie,
Thanks for the laughs and the memories of long long ago. It was an unforgettable evening. However, no thanks for the copious amounts of alcohol you supplied to this lightweight, although I will cop to my rubber arm. Lynn, thanks for being an absolute pal and drinking half that last beer. I do believe it would of been the straw that broke this drunk ass. Melanie, to use your fav expression, I loves ya, Baby!
Waiting to hear from both of you on one of your drunk dialing nights, Rick was laughing about his call. Not sure what Sherry thought of hers.. ;-)
Signed,
Never drinking again ;-)
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