On the business of. .

 (Google image)

On the business of some not so nice people.

-The person that calls another out publicly in lieu of privately. Without all the facts. To what avail? To what outcome? To what purpose??

-The neighbour that will have the Karma bus make a special stop for. Will bide my time. As the saying goes ' it's gonna be suuweeet '.

-The Holier than thou Christian spouting hate messages. Against homosexuality. Do you work for Remax? Are you above the crowd? What gives you the right??

-The idiot that said breast feeding in public is disturbing. Oh really now. And I suppose our breasts are solely there for your entertainment and pleasure? Reality check, Colossal Asswipe. They are primarily there to nourish the babies we carry for nine months, willingly ruin our bodies for and lose sleep till we're dead and gone for.

-Stupid people. I go to great lengths to avoid them so why is it every time I go out, I cross paths with one? It then serves to test all my abilities to act with decorum in public and I value not drawing attention to myself there. Because you know. . . the stupid people do it on a daily basis.


On the business of Canada.

-Yes we are polite. Don't say it like it's a bad thing. We know you are laughing at us for it but, really, the joke's on you. We pick our battles to fight, this isn't one of them. I'll let you in on a secret, we actually like being labelled as such.

-Our pride is as strong as yours but we are perhaps able to better see outside our boundaries at the fascinating land/peoples around us. Having said this, we've got our own beauty around us. In abundance. And we enjoy it to the max.

-It's weird when you 'borrow' our flag and sew it on to your luggage or backpacks. In truth, you don't get away with it much, there are tell tale signs that mark us as Canadians. Hard to explain, you have to be one to know what I mean.

-On the other hand, it's comical to hear you try to say 'Eh'. We're not laughing AT you, really. It just tickles our funny bone. After all we have an amazing sense of humour, eh. ;-)

-Come on, admit it, you like our beautiful country. You're just perhaps embarrassed (shy?) to publicly admit it in your neck of the woods for fear of reprisal? I like you, ( well most of you)  I'm not shy to say it.


On the business of Photography.

-It takes more than a simple click of the button. It takes math, preparation, forthought and afterthought  It takes hours and hours of reading/learning/experimenting. It takes commitment and a creative flair helps.

-It takes a love of the art of photography to reach a deep satisfaction. One does not have to be a professional or make money at it. In fact chances are you will not be ready to quit your day job for years to come. One might just be happy making it a hobby perhaps.

-Given all this, when another enjoys the 'fruits of one's labour' give creedence. We are not necessarily looking for an ego boost but a pat on the back or a nod in our general direction goes a long way to vindicating all the hard work put forth.

-Honestly, the best compliments come from other photographers as does the best constructive crits.

-On that subject, learn the different between petty criticism and constructive criticism. One is good, the other a waste of time and energy.

-You will learn your niche. Hone it, own it. But don't stop exploring other avenues.

-The days you leave your camera at home is the days you will smacking yourself upside the head. I know this as fact.


On the business of TV Shows:

- Elementary. It's funny, it's quirky and the two main characters have an interestingly different dynamic.

-Big Bang Theory. The day this one ends will be the day I feel like I felt when 'M.A.S.H' ended. 'Nuff said.

-Grimm. I'm not into all those gore shows or vampire/zombies themed shows and the acting isn't academy worthy but there is something about this show that I enjoy very much.

-Big Brother USA/Canada. Bwahahaha I can watch a real life soap opera/drama fest without being in the damn middle of it. AND I get to fast forward ( what would I do without my PVR?!) the utter stupidity.

-Bones. Oye, I've been watching this one since it's inception. I know there's only a few years left max but I read Kathy Reichs in the past. It was a natural conclusion I'd watch Temperance Brennan on TV.

-The New Normal. A half hour show about two men reaching out to a surrogate to have a family. The surrogate and her child are what makes the show in truth. I really enjoy this one.

On the business of blogging:

-It's been a tough winter for me on several fronts and I have questioned the validity of my blog. ( yet again ) I am not like most and go for numbers ( testament to the fact that I've been blogging since 2009 and only have 100 following. Which I'm really happy with. Honest. ) I don't blog for the sake of putting crap posts out there, there are so many that just like to barf shit on a page, follow blogs and ask you to follow them just for numbers. ( Aww, Muffin, were you not part of the popular club in high school and you are looking to be now? )
I blog for personal reasons. I enjoy writing but at times it helps me deal with stuff. In truth, it's hard to write when I am raw yet it's a catharsis for me. It also helps me bitch about things using humour. ( yup, today's post is such an example ). And yes, I do share my photography here from time to time.
I'll just ask you not to expect anything on regular intervals and if I haven't written anything in a while, I'm busy with life or I've dug myself a hole and am hiding from it. I'm known for doing that and it takes talent/ingenuity to dig me out again. Spring usually is a huge reason I dig out to face the world once more, such as I hate winter that much. Spring and Fall, my fav seasons and wouldn't you know it, two of the shortest. Sigh.

Well this concludes 'On the business of. . ' 
Take care, Peeps. See you all in the funny pages :-)

Jamie

It all started with, "Hi, you're new here?"

I know, I know, right?  How rude!
Well, actually no, not really. It's the norm for a relationship that has spanned 35 years. (give or take a couple of years? Memory really sucks. Ask her, she'll tell you the exact number. Memory like a freakin' elephant.

Her name is Donna. A.K.A My lifelong bestie.

How do I even begin to describe her?
Here's a few descriptions without getting tooooo mushy, she'd backhand me one if I did, just like I would her.

Short (she's in perfect range of your kneecaps. G'head. .piss her off, I dare ya)
Mouthy (as only a frenchman can get)
Game (always willing to help hide my bodies ha ha)
Funny (if you are into dork ass dumb humor. For Pete's sake, she laughs at the stupidest things. I envy her. I need more sarcastic,darker. . stuff. Like if you get a flat tire on your wheelchair, I'll laugh at you. I'll help you but I'll laugh first)
Loyal to the 9th degree (yeah, we've got each other's and our family's backs)
Fucking beautiful. ( which I don't hate her for. She's completely unaware of her looks, the cow)

These are just to name a few. All delievered with luuuuv, baby!

Aaaad here's where I get a wee bit serious. . . sigh.
Oh you don't like when I get serious? Aww Muffin,it won't last too long. . there, there.

To go that far back to where we started, you'd have to either hypnotize and regress me or give me the Matrix's reality altering little pill.
I can,by some miracle however, tell you the first time I saw her.
New to school. Shy, reddened easily. Yeah, I played with that like a cat plays with a mouse. The levels of red she turned were facinating and entertaining. ( now I can't even get her to blush if I did a strip tease in public, it's what she'd expect from me. Not that I'd ever do it but you get my drift.)
It was was par for the course for me in highscool, I always went to seek out the newbies. I knew how much I hated that feeling of being the new kid on the block, actutely aware of the stares. The embarrassment of a percieved wrong move or word, being picked on by idiot bullies. . I've been on the recieving end of that. So I did my best to ease it for some. Not that I was Miss Popularity but I knew the sheer terror being new and I honestly hurt for them. If they had at least one friend to start, the rest of who they would become friends with would follow. It was just up to them after that.
Only her and I gelled. For life. Who'da thunk it?! Shy and beautiful her, ugly with glasses and acned faced me.

To even try to put into words what we've been to each other, I'd need to be an award winning writer. Which I'm not. But I'll give 'er the old college try. ( which I never went to, by the way)

We've been each other's rocks, support system, sounding boards, arm chair shrinks, united stubborn headed fronts, evil mothers in unison. Yet we've been there for each other's kids when they needed someone other than their mothers. ( I'm SO the cooler one. Bwahaha)
And that's just off the top of my head.
(You can bet when we get to heaven, we're so going to have a cloud house side by each. After we sneak into St. Pete's leger book and erase a few . . ahh things behind his back. *wink*  Look for her, she'll probably have a bigger set of wings, the goody two shoes.)

The cherry on the cake has to be, and I've NO idea how the hell I'm going to top her, frikken frikken frikken her already, when she surprised me and showed up in my home for my 50th birthday.
Across the country, where we live apart from each other. And I had no idea, even if both our families knew. Throw in extended members, sisters, cousins, uncles, fathers, heck, even my 5 yr old spitfire knew and she never snitched!

If you're on my facebook, you've seen the link. I am in absolute shock, I can't even wrap my head around her in my kitchen. What the hell was she doing here across the country?? No way. . not possible! ( I'd moved away 20 years ago. I go down yearly, even if I don't see her every time. But this was the first time she'd been up. How's that for love, eh?!! )
Hope your computer's not a dinosaur and you can view this. And yes, I did the 'ugly face cry'.

By the way, you'll notice I've a slight thing for back home Montreal style bagels. :-P

Anyhow, there you have it. A love and friendship that has spanned most of our lives and will continue on to the next, where ever that may be.

Love ya mega, D.G. ❤❤❤
And sure as shit, I'm going to find a way to top you. I'm not letting you wear that crown alone,baby. Pffhhttt

Musings ( read: bitching ) of This, That and Other Things

I will be honest with you. It's a rare day to find me wandering into MacDonald's to eat. It's a waste of food and money really. For starters I always throw away top of the grilled chicken bun. The part that holds the mayo with shredded bits of lettuce. Gone. I can't eat all those yummy fries either, the salt burns the inside of my mouth. (The salt shaker is a lonely thing in my house.) I know. . . high end whiner, right? Well no BUT the times I do venture in I make sure I enjoy each and every bite. 

But after last weekend it'll be a loooong while before I go back, before my stomach lets me go back.
We decided to go into the Rocky Mountains for a quick over nighter. ( read: running away from home for a sanity break ) We stopped in to Mickey D's for a fast lunch on the go but there's no seating. It's a) lunch hour (at freakin' Mickey D's off all places to stop, sheesh ) and b) it's always tourist season there. 

So, no problem, we went back to the truck to eat. It was a nice warm'ish'ish day, the sun was shining and we were within view of mountains older than the dinosaurs.
We were minding our own, scarfing enjoying our lunch, the cars coming and going. I am a people watcher so I was very content watching the comings and goings. Better entertainment here than in the insanity of a full fast food joint complete with wailing babies.
Aaand then that's when it went south. 'Buddy' parked his car, stepped out and stream spit right in front of my truck. You know the kind, his mouth puckered up, the muscles of his throat working to bring it from deep down, his chest drawing in air to add torque to the final launch.
ShitpissFRACK. Oh. My. GOD.  GROSS.
Ooohh I felt my stomach roll.
And he did it AGAIN!
I can't wrap my head around the level of disrespect it takes to do that in front of a lady. And, yes, I consider myself one. Or at least I was brought up with manners. Some of which included not to spit out in public among people. Or launch a snot rocket, and I've had that done in front of me too. Geezus. 

HURK! Oh shit, there went my gag reflex. I worked to tamper in down. Damn it, I wanted to eat the rest of my lunch. ARGH.  

I got through that unpleasentry and a few minutes later up drove another car, five young adults piled out. From my astute observations, they were not long awake. Stretching and bed heads all around. I grinned, memories of my own hangover days of long long ago. Well actually I was laughing because they looked very hungover.
' Uhohhh, she's not gonna make 'er ' I heard hubby laugh. 

And sure as I was sitting there in full view, a female bent over heaving like a cat dislodging a hairball. My brain shouted to look down/around/gawd damn well behind me. Anywhere but her. But no, no siree, my eyes decided to lock in. She projectile vomited last night's liquid in great copious amounts, wiped her mouth and walked into the restaurant like nothing happened. . . ?
Fack. Fack. FUCK. You've got to be kidding me.
And that was it, I was done. I swallowed and sucked in air fighting to keep my lunch down. I drank the rest of my drink in one swallow. I swallowed some more.
Lunch was ruined. My 'once in a blue moon happy fries' moment was turning over in my stomach.
Stupid disgusting little bitch.
We gathered everything up, gave the area a wide berth and went to the fartherst garbage. I was terrified of seeing and or stepping or worse yet slipping her pile of puke.I wanted out.of.there. 

And what's the last thing we saw as we drove out?
Some lady bent over with the crack of her ass in proud display.
Awesome. Just fracking awesome.

We all know the popularity of iPhones, I have the iPhone 5 myself, and yes, I like it. A lot. I am somewhat of a Macintosh whore. I have a couple of iPads, a Mac Desktop, a Mac laptop along with my cell. You can blame my mother for that, she's been working Apple products since early '80s. I followed suit. 

Anyhow, here we are out and about for breakfast, it's early and the sun rise is promising to be a pretty one. I am in view of a lovely framed window, the clouds are parting and the sun is coming through. So I whip out my cell, I'm going to get a picture of this. I position my cell so it doesn't include in the back of the head of an incredibly loud and very snotty woman sitting at the table infront of us. ( all you could hear was her talking loudly of all the trips she had taken and the airlines she flew and blah blah brag brag brag blah blah. ) One of her breakfast companions must of said something to her because she whipped her head around and gave me the dirtiest look I think I've ever gotten. She turned back around and shook her head.
And me, well me being me before I could stop my mouth, fired back, 'What is your problem?'
( I try to watch my mouth and reactions when I'm out with Rick. Out of respect to him, I really don't give a shit when I'm out by myself lol )
That snotty piece of work didn't have the balls to face me back so I made a big production about taking the picture, going as far as to step out and in front of their table to take the photograph.
I mentioned something to the waitress afterwards, she told me this woman was the type that nothing was good enough. Ohh I knew/know the type, honey, I used to waitress. 

In thruth she wasn't photogenic in the least and was far less interesting than that gorgeous sunrise. Pompass ass self serving cow.

Speaking of waitresses, my daughter and I must of went through one of the most awkward meals out we ever had had the misfortune to go through a few months ago. We had a waitress hang around chatting up a storm while we ate. WTH?? Go away. Like ten minutes ago.
We haven't been back since and are leary to do so. What a weird (lonely?) girl she was. What an uncomfortable meal that was. It's like having a stranger walk into your house in the middle of your meal and converse with you. I'm normally more abrubt in situations like that but for some reason, she was a wee bit pathetic in her whole demeanor/conversation. And hey, I can be a bitch but I'm not mean.

On a lighter note, there is something so comical about a drunk sometimes. The affable kind that stand outside the bar door singing away, happy as lark. So he couldn't sing for his supper but he sang like no one was watching. Which judging by his level of sobriety, I'm not sure he could see all that much in front of him anyways. It made me laugh, bringing up memories of my father in law when he reached a certain level of 'buzz'. Couldn't sing worth shit but always tried to give Johnny Cash a run for his money. And loudly at that. lol

What about you, my bloggy pals, what are your musings and thoughts?

Open Letters. The 'Ever' edition.

Dear Peeps,
Raise the bar a little, mmkay? QUIT taking cell phone pics of yourselves in bathrooms already.
Try this idea: Find a friend ( if you have any. . ? If not get a stranger to do it, most are willing FYI) and have them take a pic. Puuleeassee.
Signed
Don't need see what your grooming area looks like. Ever.

Dear little honey,
Umm how to put this. . . your 'wanna be woman but still a dumb little teenager coming off looking like a paid whore' outfit did. not. work. You are at a movie theatre so why the black tights with strapped up pale grey'ish stilettos? Complimented ( in the case NOT ) with a blinged out dico silver top and a pilled out skirt that has seen better days? Your noodle blond and flat black hair warred. Greatly.
Signed
Someone smack your momma for letting you go out in public. Ever.

Dear 50
Bwahahaha I survived you. (. . .barely ) Kiss my '50 is the new 40' ass (sorry can't bring it down to 30, ain't going back there, baby!)
Signed
Last birthday celebrated. Ever.

Dear Biggest Loser,
I'm just not that into you this year. Sorry.
Signed
Not a healthy way to lose. Ever.

Dear Ms $$ Bags,
Talk the talk all ya want, but honey? You can't back your shit up to save your life.
By the way if you want to carry it off, don't shop at rock bottom discount places, k?
Signed,
Walk the walk, baby, or don't brag. Ever.

Dear Winter,
It's been since October. You just show up whenever and always always over stay your welcome.
Signed,
Will never like you. Ever.                              

For Today

For Today

Outside my window... 

It's the 18th day of the new year. And that's 18 days closer to spring. Boo Frikken Ya.

I am thinking...
About my camera. That I've not used since December. I'm actually mourning it. Stupid, right? Nah, not really. . you got to have a love of photography to get it. Wicked trigger finger. . .

I am thankful for...

Wine. Always so thankful for that. *wink*
    

From the Kitchen...

I'm going to make pasta. It's a carbs kinda day. 

I am wearing...

My workout clothes I've yet to find the time to change out of. Hence the carb day. Momma's not stupid. muahahha 

I am creating...

Not creating per-say but working on my husband's bday gift. That I doubt I'll get finished by March 31st. What was I thinking??!

  

I am going...

To go by one of those S.A.D. lamps. Before I jump off our famously HUGE snowbanks. Or kick everyone out of my house. 

I am reading...
Nothing. Because my fav authors are on break apparently. ALL of them. Do they get together and collectively agree to let us hang during the winter months? You writers suck. 

I am hoping...
This post doesn't sound to whiney or bitchy. Working hard to reign it in, peeps. Appreciate. 

I am hearing...

Nothing. As in NO ONE is here. Suweet Geezus, miracles happen! What ever shall I do? Strip down and dance nekked? I don't trust my nosy neighbours to be sitting in the window with binoculars. Freaks. 
Sing like no one's listening? When I said no one was here, I mean humans. My singing will probably get the dogs howlin'. Unappreciative little shits. 
Bah, screw that. I'll just sit here listening to the quiet and wait till 3 o'clock rolls around. Then it's wine time, which is like in 5 minutes Woot! ( I have a personal thing with myself, I don't have a drink before 3, dunno why. But I've always stuck to it. 

Around the house...

I'm marking what I'm going to be sticking in the 5th wheel we want to purchase when the R.V. show rolls into town.
Hurry up already. 

One of my favourite things... ( to do in the winter ) 

When the sun comes out and I stretch out on my bed, falling asleep in the sun rays. It gives me hope Spring will come again. 

A few plans for the week...
The week's done. I'll be happier after next week is finished. Specifically Tuesday. When I turn 50. Frack. Damn. Crap. Lord, gimme the strength to accept it with grace and if not then make sure NO one's within smackin' distance. I have no clue how I'll be. Consider yourself warned. 

Here is a picture I thought worth sharing...

Why could I have NOT been born with hair like this?