Wordless Wednesday-Mind over matter

This is my goal.

This is my reality.
UGH.

What the hell was she thinking??

I am still trying to wrap my head around the recent 'events' posted on facebook ( good ol' fb. A real dramafest. sigh ) for all the world to see.

There is a family member (through marriage) that posts pictures of her children. 

What's wrong with that, you ask? 

Well.. nothing really, unless it's pictures of her very young very naked children. 

A while back, she posted one of her then 2 year old daughter, naked as a jaybird, feet wide apart bent over at the waist looking at the camera through her legs. 

She posted a star in the strategic area ( a star?? ) in an attempt to make it PG.

It was cringe worthy and it was shocking. 

Try as I might, I could NOT get into her head space to see what she was thinking.
There is no way to make a picture like that PG. Sorry. 

The only people that will find that remotely acceptable is the immediate family. 

This week, this week she topped the charts, blew the damn cover clean out the hemisphere with the latest picture. 

Same child, a year older. Sound asleep in bed beside her daddy, arms over her head,naked as the day she was born, legs spread wide eagle with one bent up at the knee. 

No star this time, nope. This time the area was pixelated but it was no less shocking. My jaw fell open, my stomach rolled. I shook my head repeatedly, trying to grasp the idea behind this. Looking for the innocence in this picture, finding absolutely none. 

Innocence is a picture of a child blowing bubbles,playing with the family pet or covered head to toe in flour. That's cute, worthy of an 'ahhhh' and a smile.
Not completely naked, spread eagle, fast asleep. Too young to give permission for such a picture. 

I worked hard through the years to get across to my children their 'private parts' were exactly that. Private. I do the same with my grand daughter. There is NO picture of any one of them naked, let alone shared for all eternity on the internet. 

Sadly, this picture, I can guarantee, is probably now the ultimate fodder for sick pedophiles who troll the internet for things like this. And I can almost bet it's been found ,unpixelated and passed around. Sickening to think, isn't it. 

She's lucky if someone doesn't get mad enough to report her to the authorities. If they wanted to , they could very well charge her with pornography. ( Even if it wasn't her intent, and I know for certain it wasn't ) I think they'd be pissed off enough to, given what they witness on a daily basis.
I can't imagine the thought of someone getting off on pictures of this child, any child, sharing it within their twisted networks.. 

These pictures she continues to post can never be taken back. It is there. to.stay.

Pictures that will be circulated among the bottom of the sick gene pool. Pictures that can come back up one day and completely embarrass the innocent.  

What the hell was she thinking? She wasn't. But someone was.

Someone reported that photograph to the powers that be who work for that social media.
It wasn't me but immediately after she had a meltdown on being asked to remove it I was deleted from her 'friends' list . I was probably blamed as I've been somewhat of a favourite target within that family for years for a variety of 'offences'. 

I'm really glad someone reported it. Yet she re-posted it. This time with her favourite star. 

Didn't she get the hint when not one of her 400 so called fb friends didn't comment? I have to wonder how many were just as shocked as I... 

It makes me so very sad for this wee innocent child. Sad that her mother didn't and won't... think. Now or in the future.

:-(  

Scratch and Sniff.

Spicing up the February blahs.

Musings of This, That and Other Things

I've been struggling with the whole Adobe Lightroom concept. While I lust long for it, I always question at what point the photograph stops being 'yours'. I've seen befores and afters of shots and it's amazing the final outcome but how much is a photographer relying on it's 'magic' to fix what's wrong with his/her photograph. Much like the model who's imperfections are airbrushed out, who you see in the final photograph is not the real thing.
It begs the question; Are you, when at the point of spending more time on the comp in Lightroom, more of an editor than a photographer? Shouldn't we all work harder at the art of taking a photograph?
Truth is Lightroom scares me. It seems insanely technical and I'm not sure I'm up to the task. Of course, I've barely picked up my camera this winter. For several reasons, a couple out of my control. My fingers twitch when I haven't played with it for a while. I'm afraid to lose my 'mojo'. I spend a lot of time thinking about it though. Does that count?
I think in the end, I'll wait till my skill has improved before entering the realm of Lightroom.  (if ever) To do that, though, two things have to happen. I need to get off my duff, pick up the camera and just shoot. Anything and everything. I've been toying with the idea of street photography, and that means getting in my Jeep and driving to where the general population converge. Well actually I just need to step outside and quit letting winter chase me in and close me off. Yeah, I hate it that much.
All this talk has put me in the mood though. I think I'll pull out my new flash and trusty prime tomorrow, just to see my tired eye can ferret out. If it's not to cold, that is.

I went with my youngest daughter to an information session on Kindergarden. Yep, my baby's baby is not that anymore. Come September it'll be time for her mother to give her up to the world. I can accept it easier this go round, been through it two times already. But I know what she's going to go through and I can only hope this family has raised a strong spirited individually minded child.
Which I think is the case.
Anyhow, I looked around the room at the parents, their faces a mixture of excitement and concern. This is, after all, a huge step in their lives, I felt the same on my first born. ( can't say the same for my second though, I was counting down the days ha ha love ya, Boo <3  )
At the end of the session and in closing one of the principles of the elementary schools offered up this piece of advice.
"Don't push your child, assess if they are ready to enter the school program" ( apparently, and I did not know this, Kindergarden is not a requisite in my province's school curriculum. Huh )
And me, ohhhh me being me, ya know, because I've always been a tad bit of the class clown, pipes up 'In closing, speaking as a grandparent, there is nothing to be worried about. Start sweating it when they enter Jr. High' The parents nervously laughed but the principles and kindergarden teachers laughed the loudest, all nodding their heads in collective agreement.
I know what I speak of.
It's when my allergies to teenagers started.. and I'm afflicted with it to this day.

I wish I was better at conveying my feelings when something's upset me. I'm really crappy at it. Well not towards my family, I'm the town crier there when I'm pissed. I convey beautifully after I've slammed a couple of cupboard doors, tsked my way through the room or had a good workout. ha ha. But friends? Yeah.. no so good at it. So I shut my mouth, deal and sometimes it comes back out at the oddest, stupidest moments.
Not this time though, I'll just work through it and just let it go.
My daughter started me on this mantra not to long ago. She was with me when I had the misfortune of coming across some idiot who really needed A) his licence revoked or B) a huge neon sign on his car warning others of a blatant case of utter stupidity out for a stroll today.
Anyhow, after the incident I got my hackles up. ( happens to me when I come across idiots. I am a firm believer in the ' Here's Your Sign ' philosophy. )
My daughter calmly reached out, put her hand on my arm and said, 'Mom, breath. Let it go' She took a deep breath in through her nose and out through her mouth. I found myself copying her. ( How many times have I said this to my kids.. Practice what yer preach, Jamie )
And she was right. I instantly calmed down and .. let it go.
I've started practicing what she preached to me that day and let me tell ya, it makes for a much better ride overall. ( the sheer number of idiots on the road on any given day is mind boggling.)
Now I have to put practice into praticum. In my every day life. Starting today.
I'm letting it go. ( working on my age. Happy to report I'm getting there )
:-)
Thanks daughter of mine.

Speaking of. Same daughter. Almost 20 years ago. We walked into a restaurant and I automatically asked for the smoking section. This child, at the age of 5, asked me if we could sit in the non smoking.
Off I toddled to the smoking section but not before I saw the look of complete disappointment on her face.
I quit the following week.
So thanks again, daughter of mine.
Now can you give your sister the same look please and thanks?
;-)

So, my bloggy pals... what are your musings/thoughts?

Wordless Wednesday-Red Pin

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For Today

For Today

Outside my window...

I'm looking at the winter that isn't. I. love. it. I want to move where winter is a dirty word.

I am thinking...

about going to the gym. To do so, I have to pass my fridge. There's bacon in there. I'm afraid. 

I am thankful for...
avoiding stupid people as of late. I don't know how, but I'm thankful. Having said this, I will now be slapped upside the head a blatant display from the bottom of the gene pool I bet. You watch. 

From the Kitchen...

I will be making these cute little corn dogs. In miniature muffin cups. Picture it.   

I am wearing...
my flannels. Even if it's not cold, habits are hard to break.  

I am creating...

very little. The chickadees came back to the roost. With a little one in tow. I haven't much time to do anything creative. Well except maybe some new swear words.   

I am going...

to find hubby next weekend. I hope. ( read- running away. But if my daughters help me pack and load my car, is it running away? ) 

I am reading...

Photography books, the tricks of the trade. How much is actually sinking in is another matter altogether. :-/

I am hoping...

for an early spring. I'm greedy. I know.  

I am hearing...

the sound of sisters getting along. There was a knock 'em down, drag 'em out fight a couple of days ago. It got ugly. I got gone.

Around the house...

I am fighting to keep all surfaces from being buried by... everyone's..stuff. I stocked up on garbage bags. I ain't afraid of packrats or daughters who prefer to put anything and everything on every inch of the flat surfaces I take great pains to keep clutter free. I will fight the hard fight. They will wave the white flag.Mark my words.

One of my favorite things...
is being hugged for no reason at all. I didn't have to do anything for it, I didn't have to hand over money, or jeep keys or expensive hair products or an even more expensive flat iron. Just. Out. Of. The. Blue. Rare which means more. 

A few plans for the week...
staying sane. That's all. 

Here is a picture for thought I am sharing...

I see things uh.. differently than you.

When does this start being fun??

As everything else does at one time or another my treadmill crapped out on me. 700$ to fix it, says the repair man happily.
Yeah.. not so happy when I showed him to the door.

I paid 1200$ for it 5 years ago. I've gotten much mileage out of it but it shouldn't have given up the ghost without a fighting chance. It decided to act like it had been taken over by a malicious poltergeist with a penance for punishment. ( Say that five times fast  ha ha )
The belt now goes faster than the six million dollar man can handle. The whine and pitch coming off of it is akin to nails on a chalkboard. Gee, thanks for the good times, treadmill, but no thanks for taking my options away from me.

However, not all is a loss, I have a gym membership. Free access to all kinds of torturous devices, many of which I steer clear of by reason of hell! even I know my limits and that weird contraption is so off limits. So I use free weights, the treadmill, the elliptical, the bosu ball and other accessories there.  I also partake in the knock me down, shoot me now classes of a particularly favorite trainer of mine. Why I like her, I've NO idea. The happier she is coming into class the more it's going to hurt I've come to discover. I always say,' Jillian who??' after I've survived finished her class.

Oh but I'm sorry, I seem to have gotten away from the point of this post.
( Which by the way happens to be my 301st post. Just saying)

I always do 20 minutes of cardio, be it on the treadmill or elliptical. I wanted to try something different today, based on a commercial I saw about the hybrid treadmill stair climber. Below is the iPhone pics of my results of the three methods I've used.

Treadmill- 20 minutes. Incline 2% . Walk 2@ 3.5, Jog 2@4.0 .Last six minutes Jog

Elliptical 20 minutes. Incline 3. Average speed: 6.8 

Treadmill 20 minutes. Incline 15% @ 3.5 (despite what it says, I did two minutes of 3.1)

Look at the incline of 15%. Calories burned- 244. Over double of the other two. Let me tell you how much more of a sweat I got doing it this way. I read that it builds much more lean muscle mass to boot. Repeat after me : Um Hell Ya!
This way is my new favorite. I hate every moment of it but my body's saying otherwise.

Sigh. My body wins.
It best show some appreciation soon, stupid defiant 49 year old carcass.

It's Okay

It's Okay
...to ignore 'Dog People' at the dog park sometimes. They are an overly super friendly bunch and I need the mood to match. Sometimes I don't feel like being 'on',ya know what I mean?

It's Okay
...to slink down into the depths of 'meh' when one's birthday approaches. When one's birthday's in January, in Northern Canada. In the middle of freakin' miserable winter. On the last year of my 40's. It's my non-party day and I'll cry if I want to. Um..head's up, best steer clear next year.

It's Okay
...to work off a good healthy mad that 1 sister out of 3 reached out to wish me happy birthday on my 'do not acknowledge today' day. I know I know.. but I want it both ways, mmkay?

It's Okay
...to use the 'padded' room to do your workouts, sweethearts, but come on already, you little shits are taking up 3/4s of the room. And seriously? You're not recording a workout video so stop acting like it.

It's Okay
...to love call display as much as I do. I'd go without a TV first. Have I mentioned this before? I. love. call. display.

It's Okay
...to let Super Guide play out some of my Donkey Kong Returns levels. It's that or I'll break that stupid machine.

It's Okay
...to do the ugly face cry. Just not on TV. Over a sloth, no less. Funny her.

It's Okay
...to sorta be glad hubby's going out of town to work for a bit. I get the whole freakin' bed to myself and I don't have to wear earplugs to sleep! Here's to mashing myself in the bed and hoggin' the.whole.freaking.thing.
:-)

What about you , my bloggy pals, what are you Okay with?