Open Letters

Dear Louie Armstrong,

It IS a wonderful life but nobody sings it better than you , my friend. Your smile alone can make up for the lack of sun on a cloudy day. Thank you.

Sincerely,

A Friendly Fan

Dear Dishwasher,

Why helloooo good lookin'. You are my sanity savior, my time saver and my hands smoother. It's a shame you can't do housework, you let me down a bit in that regards. But I'll overlook the slight because you keep my kitchen looking tidy(er).

Unabashedly grateful,

Dishpan hands.

Dear James,

It was a lovely day, wasn't it? We had ourselves a grand conversation. It makes me happy that within our conversation you were able to reach your decision, although I suspect you already had it made in the back of your mind. I wish you happiness and I wish you  'Enough' . Remember... nothing is gained by 'easy' and there's monotony in 'safe' but sometimes what is a hard road really isn't, it's a blessing in disguise.

Love,

the other 'James'

Dear Life

Why do you choose to go by so quickly? I can't keep up in case you are not aware. Slow down a tad will you? Let me enjoy those moments that imprint on my heart just a wee bit longer? I implore you.

Signed,

Strapped in for the ride.

Dear Jolt of Java, 

Thanks for caffeine rush @ 7:30 pm. I don't normally enjoy you at this hour but my lovely daughter brought you to me and I wasn't about to turn her or you down. I'm tired enough to sleep tonight so have no fears on keeping me awake.. this time. 

Sincerely

Java Jazzed but Beat to the Bone

Not So Dear Ol Man Winter, 

You have GOT to be kidding me right? Rain, freezing rain then snow?? And to have to wake up to that shit crap? You've a sick sense of humor and if you care to look around, you'll see nobody laughing but you. Nasty piece of work you are. Die already.

Signed,

Disgusted & Disgruntled

Dear Jesse James

One word. DUMBASSMORONFOOLIDIOTLOSER. 

Sign me,

I hope Sandra tosses you away like the piece of garbage you are.

:-)

March's Musings of This, That and Other Things.

I am at a loss as to what to do with myself lately. I have packed as much as I need to and the four walls are closing in on me. Fast. Sure and a good reason to head over to Starbucks to regain sanity.

Speaking of... I love people watching at that coffee shop. The clientele is so vastly different than Tim Horton's. Everything from young families to the older generation with everything in between. And the Baristas as SO much more friendlier than Tim's. Pardon my rudness but they can speak English.

Speaking of People .. Some most People (of Walmart) need their own island. 'Nuff said.

I've been offered the chance to go to Hawaii again. Imagine that, but I've turned it down. I know I know, crazy eh? ( <--- yeah ---> colour <--- me Canadian) Truth? I want to go to Scotland, home of my ancestors. Aye grand adventures awaits me. :-)

I'm in the process of switching over to glass containers from plastic. Trouble is, I'm clumsy and tend to break anything, I even shattered a Corel dish. You know the brand, right? The unbreakable dishes hubby got for me because I'm clumsy special.  Ppfftt! Broke some of that no problem. I have tile floors in the kitchen and some of those glass containers are heavy. Can you see where I'm going with this? Is there such a class I can take called 'Tile & Grout 101'? 

My daughter's turning twenty and you think the teens years are behind her right? Well..didn't she up and roll her eyes at me three times the other day! I could of cheerfully poked her beautiful peepers out. Drove me nuts when she was 15 and that was her favorite  'push Mom's button' action. But have no fear, I have a secret weapon. I have her daughter.. muahahah it's called cookies and chocolate and candy before going back home to Mommy's. ;-)

Why is it I can take those monsters mutts for a walk, bring them back home FILTHY freakin' dirty, get them rinsed off without acting like the roof is caving in? YOU took them out for a walk, dear Hubby. YOU get them clean again. Hint: Keep them on a (short) leash till you get them under the sprayer. Hello?

Speaking of.. Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

As much as I don't do reality shows, I found myself series recording Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew. It's bloody entertaining, it's what it is. But try as I might, I can't seem to work up sympathy for some of those spoiled overindulgent whiners people in there. My bad. Oh and Heidi Fleiss? You are scary ice cold shite, woman.

What are your musings of the day? :-)

Remember? No, I don't. Arghh

I'm a walking case for the need to take some sort of memory pill but I wouldn't remember to take the bloody thing.
Yeah yeah, I know. Do Sudoku or Crosswords. Hate 'em both. Or rather, don't have the patience for them. Anything to do with improving my memory I balk at.
What are you on about , Jamie, you ask? Well..I'll tell you.
How's about sitting in the Walmart parking lot , listening to 96.3 and a stupid song from wayyy back is making my eyes water. Not that it's embarrassing enough, no, I also have no idea why it's making me cry. And believe you me, I'm NOT a public crier.
I sit there trying to figure it out, the memory is dancing on the very edge of my subconscious but it's refusing to take the leap to bring me in on it.
I have SO many memories like that. Drives me nuts at times trying to remember or IF I'm supposed have a memory attached to what I'm feeling. Arghhhh

This station is a good/bad thing for me.I just never know when I'll be driving along and whoops there goes my eyes again, springing a freakin' leak. Damn. It.
However, it's not all sad/bad. There are songs that take me to a time where all I had to worry about was being back home in time for supper. Waking up, packing my backpack with a lunch, a bathing suit and book and spending the day at the pool. With friends. As in without adult supervision. Pissed off because I wasn't 13 yet and couldn't stay in the pool after 5. I'd been there since 10 am.Yeah, it was a tad bit safer back then. We were actually allowed to BE kids.
We used to be out after supper riding our bikes all over town, without a care in the world. Wow, just to type that makes me shake my head at the state of today. Kids doing that in the here and now? Never, ever. We can't let them out in the backyard without checking on them every 15 minutes. Drive by shootings, drugs and all manner of the nasty side of society. Sad. It makes me sad they don't have what I did. A relatively danger free/predator free play zone/upbringing.

But I digress. And I could continue to digress but that's not the point of this particular blog.

It's frustrating not to be able to remember but maybe that's not a bad thing. Maybe there's a reason, maybe there's not. Who knows. On the grand scheme of things, I'm pretty much a normal viable contributing member of society. I just suck b a d at the memory game. The thought of a high school reunion terrifies me, how the hell am I going to remember you? Hey Donna G ? When the time comes, if the time comes, you are NOT allowed leaving my side. You will stand in for my memory, comprendo Amigo?

But sighh.. songs.. certain smells..deja vu's, the mysteries of my life. I just wish the stupid water works wouldn't flow at will, kinda sorta dangerous when I'm driving 110 clicks an hour and things blur up on me. Or in a Walmart parking lot, looking like I've either got a wicked gas pain or losing in within the confines of my Jeep.
Sheesh.

I Believe

  I Believe

...Three ring binders are evil and out to get you.

...I'd like to be able to draw in my next life. I'd dive bomb at Pictionary.

...a lotto ticket should definitely be purchased when you pass a cop that has a taxi pulled over and is giving him a ticket. And two in one week?! Hello? Where am I? Am I on some parallel universe?

...we can pass a mohawk haircut with merely a glance yet we sneer at mullets. Takes guts to prance around with one if you stop and think about it.

...my generation is known as workhorses ( definition #2 ) ,  my hands are testimony. Sniff

...I'll have the worse nightmares ever when my Nightmare Slayer is out of town working.

...little white dogs have no business being outside during the Spring thaw. Yuck.

...when you've reached the point of no return, you just as well to keep going. Screw it. ;-)

...the weatherman neglected to let us know the windchill factor. Nasty sense of humor.

...fifth graders are smarter.

...The one and ONLY downside to being slimmer is always being cold.

...there's a two tier justice system here. Jaffer proved it without a shadow of a doubt.

...in and have used the saying, 'Ya burn your ass, ya sit on the blister.'

 

What do you believe?

Home is where you make it, but there's no place like 'home'.

When big changes come I find myself missing 'home'. I don't know why but it is what it is.
I know myself well enough to understand I'm due to return 'home' again.This time though I will take a couple of weeks. Family first and foremost, friends from thirty some odd years back. That is comfort, that is where I can be.. me. Just plain Jamie. 
My husband and I have talked about buying a cottage there. I think within the next two years, we'll make that a reality. The girls will take comfort in also knowing they have a place where they can go 'home' again. Even if they've spent the majority of their lives here, this place imprinted in their hearts and there, they can just be.. them.


So without further ado, here are my roots.

(google image)

The water is so blue, and the air crisp. The strength of the sun and the brilliance of the fall colours leaves you in awe.

(google image)

So many photographers come to this area. It's no wonder why.

(google image) 

In one of our houses, we had a creek running in our back yard. The coons and deer ambling by. If I had this particular creek now, I'd have it made.

This was my backyard. A big one to mow but a lovely breathing space.

I miss her something wicked, something fierce. She represents 'home' to me. In many ways, with maternal me, this was my first 'baby'.







Traditions run deep, we can practice them anywhere we live, but to be able to go back to where life was simpler, if only for a little while, is good for the soul. It allows one to gain strength, to recognize what one has, to go back and carry on.

Are we NOT any further than this??

This week I received a very emotional email from a very very dear friend.
She's hurting on a deep down level I can't even reach her at.
The cause of this pain? Her convictions. Her beliefs. Who she is.
And we make her pay for it. Or rather society does, specifically the male gender.
Back in my day it wasn't expected for us to 'put out'. Hell, they were happy if
they scored some kisses and a few gropes.
No I didn't grow up in the stone ages, BUT I did grow up in a simpler time.
To watch today's society, I am grateful for that time period. But  I am so angry and disgusted at the male population of today.
It's all about getting laid. Period.

I am sick of seeing the women I care about pay for their strengths.
My daughter, who doesn't 'put out',isn't a size sub zero and has a child pays... dearly
My dear dear friend who is questioning what she believes in pays...painfully
My other dear friend that was slapped a crappy deal and who's child is a preteen pays...every time.

What point have we reached when our chances at a date depends on being a subzero sized childless easy lay?? Haven't we come further than this?? How dare you delegate us to this level.
Who are YOU to make her question herself, or find her unsatisfactory for not reaching your cheap shallow standards?
Who are YOU?
I'll tell you who YOU are. In a few years YOU will be that middle aged balding, stressed out unhappy middle of nowhere/minimum wage idiot that looks like a fool driving that little secondhand 15 year old sports car. And your life will be as shallow as that puddle you just drove over.

My girls? They'll be living a full happy life with the few good men that are out there. I might not be able to convince them of that now, (it's hard cutting through that layer of hurt and disillusionment you're solely responsible for.) but I know this because I used to be that girl who paid dearly for her beliefs. I married one of those few good men AND I know where you are today, jerk.

It's Okay!

 

 

 

It's Okay!

 

...to think uber nasty thoughts at the dumb ass that wouldn't let me ahead of her in Costco's Sunday mid afternoon lineups. I wouldn't want to push ahead of her OVERFLOWING cart with my TWO items, thanks for giving me ample time to people watch.

 

...to mourn your fingernails. They're gone. Packing a house isn't condusive to having long fingernails. Suck it up, Buttercup. sigh

 

...to want a big honkin' steel bumper on your food cart. I wouldn't hit and run either, I'd look you straight in the face as I drive you and your buggy the other side of the store. Where I'm not.

...to miss stuff crust pizza. With beer. Screw the veggies.

...to go organic, I applaud you. But your snotty & holier than thou attitude isn't. You didn't have to near knock us on our asses because we were pondering the purchase. Breath

...to have a Blackberry or iPhone, they are entertaining. But folks? It's really ok to ignore it when you are in the middle of a conversation. Your message or email or Fb or Twitter status update will STILL be there waiting for you at the end of it.

 

...to crave a smoke at times, even after 17 years of quitting. Stand beside someone smoking and inhale deeply. It'll work on the first 2 inhales, you'll choke blue on the 3rd. And when someone invents a smoke that doesn't harm you , it'll be okay to knock even the Queen on her ass to be first in line to get one. :-)

 

...to have an easy sense of humor. I envy the fact you can laugh at dorkiest things. But don't worry if you don't comprehend a sarcastic nature, we are set apart and labeled a different breed. 

...to dance like no one's watching, I'm ignoring you and busting a move at the same time. Talented aren't I? I just can't embarrass the girls anymore with it. Crap.

 

So...what are you Okay with?

Books Books Books

Are there any readers out there? You know who you are, you know what you are like. Books are entertaining. They take you through peaks and valleys of emotions, allow you to live another life for a while. The books you buy, you take care of. As a rule, right? Right.

Ok, so.. if you know me you know how important my books are to me. I don't collect many, 4 authors in all I think. But they have an extensive list so I have quite a bit.
I don't freely hand/lend them out. I did once and they were ALL returned plus a little gift included in the return. ( She was so appreciative she gave me a lovely gift certificate to Chapters. Lovely lovely lady )

Last year, I lent out an entire series of books by one author to someone I had known for many years. I figured this person respected me enough to take care of them. Right? Wrong. Again, damn it. To top it off I had a devil of a time getting them back, I was just glad when I did. I tucked the box into the back of the closet and promptly forgot about them. 
Till now.
I've had to pack up all the books for the upcoming move. ( hopefully this will be the last time for a while and I can get a library unit to shelve them? hint hint my handsome hubby ;-)  )
I separated the authors into three boxes and went through the series of the ones I had lent out. Dunno why, just had a feeling.
Four of them missing, six duplicates :-(  WTF?!!  I was choked but yet once AGAIN, my fault, my bad. I should of known better. But I worked very hard at collecting them all. Minimum wage, long hours and sacrifices at the book store. Thanks.So.Much. At the time I knew of one book that had been destroyed but I'd been reassured it was replaced. Ok fine, great. No problem. Um problem.. it wasn't replaced, it was among the missing.

As a rule I don't borrow things, the above being a fine example why. But you may be SURE the few times I do, I borrow because I HAVE to and for a VERY short amount of time. I worry too much about damaging or losing the borrowed item.

I hunted down the missing titles in the book stores, bought them AGAIN and that, my friends, is the LAST time I will lend them out.
The six duplicates? It was my initial reaction to trash them but I am a lover of books and couldn't bring myself to throw them away. I gave them to my daughter, she'll exchange them in a used bookstore for something she hasn't read yet.
:-)

and the beat goes on...

March's Open Letters

Dear Organic Dark Chocolate
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. :-)
In your dark delicious debt,
Chocoholic Chickie


Dear Wallet,
Can you find a money I.V. to feed you? I've been in the mood to open you up and empty you. Go ahead, shake the money tree, then come back..we'll shop talk.
Waiting,
Wallet Wench 


Dear Jeep,
Go WASH yourself already. Do you know how dirty you are? You outta be ashamed of yourself prancing around like that. Find an ounce of pride will you.
Disgusted,
Your Navigator


Dear Dog,
Much like the Jeep, I have NO idea how you stand yourself. Why oh friggen WHY do you roll in unidentifiable stuff? Have you no shame? Can't you stay clean for more than a day on end? Go wash yourself already, you look funny and you smell. Bad.
Holding my nose,
Your human 'Mom'.


Dear Sleep,
Why, hello :-) Where have you been the last two years? I've missed you. It's awfully nice of you to visit me the last three nights in a row. In the future, don't be such a stranger.
Sleep Sated(for now),
Siesta Sistah.


Dear Hubby,
It's not a good idea to surpass my given line on the wine glass when you pour. I know you do it for shits and giggles but as you recently found out, crankiness sets in if I've had too much. And what is too much? A hair close to the halfway mark. What did you pour? Over half. By two hairs. You had to put up with me till I went to sleep. And I made sure I stayed up LONGER than usual. :-)
signed,
Your lighweight lush of a wife.


Dear Lil Boo,
Don't grow up so fast please? Your mother and Auntie Bella pulled that on me not to long ago and I'm still not all that happy about it. Let's stop time for a bit, shall we? We'll  run, we'll play, we'll take every moment, stretch it out to it's limit, and then slow it down a little bit more.
Not likin' the time tickin',
'Nammie'


Dear New Sunglasses,
Can I tell you HOW much I needed you? Can I tell you how pretty you are?  Can I tell you how much I love hiding behind you? Afterall, people watching is only fun if you don't get caught at it.
Eyes locked and loaded,
Your Grateful Peepers

Dear First Cup of Coffee in the Morning,
Why hello you beautiful thing you. The 'drip drip' of that dark amber liquid is music to my ears. That first sip of your magic elixir brings my body to resemble a being. Phooey on the naysayers anyways, they are seriously missing out.
your loyal devotee,
Jonsin' for Java

It's ALL about the food my friends.

This is why I work out. Period.

The wonder of yeast and flour

Manipulated into any shape you desire 

And I desire this which 

is part of a Frenchman's favorite meal

 Pulled out some ingredients

and came up with this. YUM leftovers for me. ;-)